Saturday, February 10, 2007

adoption - the search

My cousin and his wife are looking to adopt a baby. I knew they had been wanting to become parents for some time, so I was thrilled to hear about their decision. I pray their journey to their baby is mercifully swift. I know how cruel infertility can be, and how heartbreaking it is to wait year after year while all your friends already have kids. I don't know this cousin particularly well - we didn't grow up in the same part of the country - but I've always liked him. Anyone who features Oreo cookies at his wedding reception is automatically dear to my heart.

They are currently spreading the word, hoping that in their extended networks of family and friends they will find someone who knows someone who is pregnant and needs to find an adoptive family for her baby. I'm putting this out there just in never know how a connection will be made, but I'm willing to use my blog as a vehicle if it could help bring a baby to his or her "forever family." Let me know if you know anyone, and keep your eyes open.

The adoption world is full of twists and turns. A weird thing happened to us just a couple of months ago. Back in 2003 we had given our profile to a local attorney friend who does adoptions, and when nothing came of it after a year, we decided to go ahead with international adoption. Three years and two adoptions later, we got a call saying a pregnant woman had seen our profile and was interested in us; would we be willing to adopt her baby? Eek. I was POSITIVE we had removed our profile from the attorney's office when we applied to adopt from Korea. It felt awful to feel we had actually misled anyone, even unintentionally, and to have to say "no" - the timing now would be impossible - Sam's adoption isn't even final yet. May the mom and baby find the family they were meant to be with.

Speaking of adoption, my friend and fellow blogger - who is also mom to a Korean adoptee - recently cancelled her subscription to Parenting magazine. They published a pretty stupid and offensive piece in their "Mom Debate" feature this month: Should singles be allowed to adopt? For more see

I'm cancelling my subscription too, out of protest. But I can't help pointing out an ironic twist: Korean adoption agencies do not allow their babies to go to single parent homes. Ah, what a world we live in.

1 comment:

Mommavia said...

I am still upset with Parenting for asking that question and printing their selected responses, even if Korea doesn't allow singles to adopt. Very ironic, and I did leave out that fact when I wrote the letter to them. China has slimmed down on the number of singles they allow to adopt, while Korea is allowing singles living in Korea to adopt domestically. Countries make rules to they are comfortable with the family that their child is going to, and some of them may see insane!

Best of luck to your cousin and his wife...praying that the wait is quick and the process has few snags!