MauldenNews April 2012

This April was warmer than usual and quite beautiful, with many blue-sky days and flowers. We've even had some warm evenings. 

I really liked this picture by my friend Tammy.

Had a WONDERFUL weekend with 2 of my sisters...here we are in order, by age and inversely by height...aren't we gorgeous???

We went to an Easter egg hunt at Sugarhouse Park with friends...love the expressions here...

and we made our own colorful eggs with good old Pabst tablets and vinegar. 

Sam turned SIX with a swimming pool party...

and then we had 2 totally awesome weeks with Nana (Bryan's mom). She is wonderful beyond words. 

Finally...even though April may be over...as you can see...

...the fun never stops around here.

See you next month! Love you all,

Sarah

MauldenNews March 2012

This month we enjoyed watching winter transform into spring.  I try to remember to enjoy and appreciate the little ordinary things...a warm cup of coffee, first flowers blooming, the longer evening light, a good night's sleep.

The kids still like to sleep on the floor, bundled up burrito-style. I frequently find Alle curled up on top of her heater vent in the morning.


Bryan and I celebrated our birthdays this month. Both of us were lucky to be able to take the day off from work. We're grateful for another year of good health, good fortune, and the gift of family and friends.

 The candle-lighting is always fascinating.

Isn't he awesome?!?!? 


Other fun activities this month:


- kite flying! We finally got some good windy days and successfully flew our shark kite. It eventually ended up high in a tree, irretrievable, but it was a learning experience. :-) We have also learned that a $3 Spiderman kite from Walmart can be worth hours of fun.


- workouts - I completed my 90-day P90X challenge with stronger abs, bigger shoulders, and the ability to do kickboxing moves without falling over as much. It's a good home workout program and I'll probably do it again, but for now I'm really happy to get back to running. We have a new leader in our Galloway program this year and she informed us that we'd been miscalculating our walk-run ratios last year. So I'm starting over with new information and new training tactics and it will be interesting to see where it goes! I'm hoping to run another marathon in the fall - I want to run 10 marathons in 10 states, so I need to find one outside of Utah, Nevada and Arizona. Anyone want to meet up and do the Denver Rock & Roll in October???


Book(s) of the month: I really enjoyed the audio recording Being Peace by Thich Nhat Han. I also started reading Wild by Sheryl Strayed - her account of solo backpacking on the Pacific Crest Trail when she was 26. Her only weapon was "the world's loudest whistle" and she hiked for days at a time without seeing a single person - I bet it's more heavily populated now. I have actually hiked portions of that trail above Donner Lake and in the Desolation wilderness area. It makes me want to do another backpacking trip someday. My last attempt was sometime around 1994, when we tried to go with my dad to Yosemite and got snowed out in September.


And that's all the news. See you next month!

MauldenNews February 2012

Hello all,

We've had a good month - mild weather...not much noteworthy. Things are peaceful. 

I'm continuing P90X (home DVD workout program) and I've been able to stick with it pretty well, only missing a couple of workouts. I miss running, but it's also nice to take a break and it's definitely convenient to work out indoors in winter.  I'm now starting week 9 (of 12). The upper body work is paying off nicely - I find snow shoveling is getting much easier and doesn't leave me sore afterwards anymore. 

Bryan and I have been volunteering at the kids' school by helping in the lunchroom. I've heard that Bryan is very entertaining to the kids. I'm probably more boring, but it's fun to see all the kids and watch them interact. It's also interesting to see what they bring and what they actually eat. Their hot lunches are better than what I remember having as a kid.

Here are some pictures from a visit to the Aviary with Sam (and a few friends).

I think that's all I have. Hope all is well with everyone.

MauldenNews January 2012

No pictures this month...camera fatigue from Christmas, perhaps? Sorry, you'll have to use your imaginations...


Every new year brings new experiences, some anticipated, some not. A few things that were new for us this month:


- We started speech therapy with Sam. He tends to "stutter" when he gets excited, only I didn't really recognize it or think of it as stuttering.... he often repeats a whole word or phrase several times, often at the end of a sentence more than the beginning....anyway, we are learning and playing new games at home, and Sam is happy to have new ways to earn lollipops.


- Alle's new thing is selling Girl Scout cookies for the first time. She had her whole sales spiel memorized and performed it for all the neighbors and anyone who would listen. She even told everyone what cookies she thought they should buy. She really wanted to earn the prize for selling 1000+ boxes...funny how they have NO idea what is realistic at this age. 


For some reason being the mom of a Girl Scout feels like such a new and foreign phase of parenthood to me. But it's good. I like her cute little Daisy troop and I feel very domestic when I iron the patches on her uniform.  We sold 61 boxes and I took the opportunity to order all the kinds I had never ordered before. Now I need an excuse to have a cookie party.


- We tried a couple new foods this month -  fresh fennel (in salad with oranges & red bell peppers) and parsnips (julienned and roasted with rosemary and thyme). I thought both were good, even though I'm not a big fan of anise flavor. Why a green bulb should taste like black licorice is beyond me. Sometimes it's like a game to find new stuff in the produce section, since a lot of it is not labeled, at least here. It's also fun to stump the checkout person when buying weird vegetables. Next time I might try rutabaga if I get brave.


- I've taken a break from running and instead I'm doing a new workout routine called P90X. I'm 3+ weeks into the 90-day program. It's a good change and good for core and overall fitness... The strategy is "muscle confusion" ... I think I'm successfully confusing my muscles. I was skeptical about the kenpo kickboxing, but I'm even enjoying pretend-punching and kicking more than I thought I would. 


- Status update on my 21-day challenge: I'm still at it! My wristband is wearing thin, but my complaining frequency has definitely gone down. Yay! It's amazing how automatic complaining is for me. Sometimes I just can't think of anything to say that's not a criticism or complaint so I am learning to just...be quiet. I liked what one finisher said - when we keep our complaints quiet, it's easier to hear God speak to us. 


- I'll close as usual with my Book Pick of the month: Mudhouse Sabbath by Lauren Winner. The author grew up Jewish and is now Christian. Really liked her interesting perspective on Jewish practices like keeping Sabbath, lighting candles, mourning, prayer and others. 


- May you all be happy and at peace. Keep in touch.

  

MauldenNews December 2011

Greetings and Happy New Year to all!

This year, I read a book about unplugging the Christmas machine. It inspired me to scale down and slow down. We did a bit less and I think we enjoyed things a bit more. We celebrated Advent with a wreath and candles this year, as well as the traditional Advent calendars. Sam went on a binge one night about mid-December (unsupervised) and ate all his remaining advent calendar chocolates. Alle took the opposite approach and saved them up for days. Two different approaches to life.

We celebrated the halfway point of the school year with a little "Awards Dinner" for the kids. Alle got prizes for honesty and truth telling, becoming a super reader, and overcoming stage fright (joined her class in the school Christmas program this year). Sam earned his seatbelt award (he buckles and unbuckles independently), as well as awards for awesome dancing and unbridled enthusiasm for life.

Other holiday stuff- we tried baking new cookies - Dutch spice cookies (speculaasjes or windmill cookies) and my new favorite, Nigerian sesame seed cookies. We made a lemon raspberry birthday cake for Jesus too.

We had a wonderful Christmas - in fact, we had two. We opened gifts at home and then flew to Little Rock to spend a week with Bryan's side of the family. It was wonderful to reconnect with them and they were very gracious hosts, especially when our plane was delayed and we ended up staying 3 days longer than planned. We sure soaked up the sunshine and warm weather. I enjoyed bird (and squirrel) watching, especially the cardinals, downy woodpeckers and others we don't see in Utah. I even saw my first great blue heron while running on a wooded trail by a stream near the house. I love Utah, but I have to admit I could handle Arkansas winters!

I've been listening to a series of essays called "This I Believe" on NPR - the idea is to summarize your core beliefs in a few hundred words. The series includes a number of essays by famous Americans from the 1950s, when the concept was first introduced and the essays read on the radio. (Examples: Helen Keller, Eleanor Roosevelt, Jackie Robinson, etc.) There are also essays written by ordinary people in the present day.

I have yet to write my essay, but here are a few things I believe in:

I believe that even in the digital age, books still make some of the very best Christmas presents.

I believe in spending time with your family at Christmas.

I believe little boys and their daddies need to stick together.

I believe creativity and artistry are innate and to be enjoyed by all.

I believe in surrounding ourselves with beauty. Thanks again to Chris Allec for this masterpiece. I feel serene just looking at it.

I believe in SLEEP!

Last but not least, I believe in reading good books. My pick of the month is called Sabbath by Wayne Muller. This is one of those treasures you have to read slowly and savor. There's a lot of wisdom behind the concept of a set-apart time for rest. May you all experience the joy of finding the right rhythm between work and rest  in 2012.

The Complaint Free Challenge

OK, I got this idea from a random audiobook I picked up at the library (A Complaint Free World by Bill Bowen). Maybe it's just another hokey self-help fad, but it was just intriguing enough (and speaks to my awareness that I do complain too much) that I'm giving it a shot. Many years ago, one of my sisters told me, "All you do is complain." It was surprising to me because I really didn't perceive myself that way.  It's been a few weeks since I've begun the challe nge, and I'm not under any illusions. I complain quite a bit - but at least I'm a lot more aware of it now. And I've managed to go two consecutive days without complaining since November 12. How about that.

The goal is to go 21 consecutive days without complaining, criticizing, or gossiping. I'm also adding "yelling at my kids," one of my less noble habits, to the list. The method is to wear a bracelet, rubber band, or whatever around your wrist. When you catch yourself complaining, criticizing, or gossiping, you switch the wristband to the other wrist and start over. When you reach 21 consecutive days without moving the wristband, you win. Everyone around you wins too.

A caveat about the book: the author claims quite a bit about how your life will change and how the universe will bless you if you do this challenge. I'm not necessarily endorsing the whole book here, but I invite you to join me in the challenge if you're interested. No reading required.

Some rules: complaints, criticism, or gossip that happens in your head is free. Any of the above that comes out of your mouth requires a wristband switch. Even if you're just complaining to yourself (which I've discovered I do!) you have to move the bracelet if the words escape your lips.

The idea is NOT to just stuff it when something bad happens. You are allowed and encouraged to request what you DO want, but only from someone who can help the situation. If the waiter brings you cold soup, you don't gripe to your table companions or yell at the waiter. You simply inform the waiter (politely) that your soup is cold and ask for hot soup.

If you have a friend who agrees to play the game with you, that's great. You may point out the friend's need to move her bracelet, but if you do so, you must also move your own bracelet.

Gossip is actually allowed, if: 1) whatever you're saying about the person is complimentary, and 2) you would repeat it word for word in the person's presence.

One thing I found helpful from the book was this description of how we change or learn a new skill. The progression goes like this:
 - unconscious incompetence (we're unaware of our complaining)
- conscious incompetence (we become aware of our complaints)
-conscious competence (we start to be able to control our complaints, but it requires conscious effort)
- unconscious competence (we reach the point where complaining is no longer automatic)

The analogy that came to me is driving a car. At first it requires a lot of conscious effort and we find it difficult to attend to all the details needed to drive safely and smoothly. But eventually, we develop the skills and habits to drive well even while on "autopilot." We still have to pay attention, but it gets easier.

So...we'll see how this goes. The average person takes 4-8 months to complete the challenge. I'm shooting for May 12, which would be 6 months. Even if I don't make it by then, I'll be giving my family, friends and myself the gift of not hearing as much whining from me.

E-mail me or comment if you're interested in taking the challenge with me!

the Truth

Well, it finally happened. Alex and I had the big talk. I told her the truth.

No, not about sex. (She already knows about that.) About Santa.

A little history...last Easter we surprised the kids with new bikes on Easter morning. We had them going with the whole Easter bunny story, UNTIL we stepped outside to go to church and Alex saw the bike boxes in the recycler. All of a sudden she stopped. It all dawned on her. She turned to us and said, "Wait...the Easter bunny didn't give us those bikes - YOU GUYS did it! You LIED to us!" We admitted to all the deception and tried to explain why we "lied" - but she was angry and feeling betrayed. I felt bad - I don't remember getting mad at my parents when we figured it out as kids - but I could see how she felt lied to. She made us promise to tell her the truth in the future.

So...fast forward to this Christmas season. I thought maybe the Easter bunny realization would carry over to Santa and she would have it all figured out, but nope...she and Sam were still believers. Until yesterday. Bryan and I had talked it over a couple weeks ago and decided we need to come clean this year. We didn't want to betray any trust or repeat the whole scene where she felt cheated and deceived and lied to. Bryan remembers feeling disappointed and betrayed by his parents when he found out the truth. And I heard from another friend who remembers clearly how hurt she was, that her trust in her parents was damaged and she felt she couldn't talk to them about it, and it even got her questioning her faith in God (which is logical).

Anyway, we hadn't found the right opening so we never actually followed through. I still have mixed feelings about dashing a child's innocent beliefs in Santa. But yesterday, Alex mentioned Santa and I knew I had to take the opportunity.

So I told her. I reminded her that she asked us always to tell her the truth and that we want to honor that. I tried to break it to her gently. I explained that it is a story that began with a real person named Saint Nicholas who loved children, protected them, and gave them gifts. I told her how people all over the world are inspired by Saint Nicholas and how the story grew. Just like the stories we see in the movies, the Santa story is "based on a true story" but has added bits of fairy tale and magic. It's not "real" but it points us to the truths of Christmas, like the love of God for us and the joys of giving. She took it all in calmly, though I could see her mind was working on processing this new information. She asked, "Then who is that guy in the white beard?" I explained that the Santas we see around town are people dressed up like Santa. "Why in the world would they do that?" she wondered. So funny, the way her mind works! Overall, it was a good conversation. Whew!  I reminded her that Christmas is really about the birth of Jesus. She said, "Oh, I know. I told my Sunday school class the whole story of Christmas. No one knew it except me and the teacher. I was the hero."

So the truth is out. Part of me still feels sad, but she is growing up and I knew the truth would come out one way or another. I'd rather she hear it from me than from kids at school. I feel I did the right thing to maintain her trust.